How to Make a Good Confession - Sacrament of Penance

What is Confession?

Confession is a sacrament instituted by Jesus Christ in his love and mercy. It is here that we meet the loving Jesus who offers sinners forgiveness for offenses committed against God and neighbor. At the same time, Confession permits sinners to reconcile with the Church, which also is wounded by our sins.

The sacrament, as the Catechism of the Catholic Church notes, is known by many names. Sometimes "it is called the sacrament of conversion because it makes sacramentally present Jesus' call to conversion" (1423). But it is also better known as "the sacrament of Penance, since it consecrates the Christian sinner's personal and ecclesial steps of conversion, penance, and satisfaction" (1423).

For many of us it still continues to be known as "the sacrament of confession, since the disclosure or confession of sins to a priest is an essential element of this sacrament" (1424). At the same time, the Catechism reminds us that "it is called the sacrament of forgiveness, since by the priest's sacramental absolution God grants the penitent 'pardon and peace'" (1424). Finally, it is also called the sacrament of Reconciliation because it reconciles sinners to God and then to each other (1424). In this text, we will refer to the sacrament as the sacrament of Penance.

Through this sacrament, we meet Christ in his Church ready and eager to absolve and restore us to new life. The graces of Christ are conferred in the sacraments by means of visible signs - signs that are acts of worship, symbols of the grace given and recognizable gestures through which the Lord bestows his gifts. In the sacrament of Penance, the forgiveness of sins and the restoration of grace are the gifts received through the outward sign, i.e., the extension of hands and words of absolution pronounced by the priest.

What is Sin?

Unfortunately, in society today, many people have lost the understanding of sin. Our Holy Father has stated that "it happens not infrequently in history, for more or less lengthy periods of time and under the influence of many different factors, that the moral conscience of many people becomes seriously clouded. . . . Too many signs indicate that such an eclipse exists in our time" Reconciliation and Penance, 18). In our day, many people have lost the sense of sin and feel that they can do whatever they wish without considering or fearing the consequences.

For such people, the term "sin" has no meaning. Yet we know that sin is a terrible evil which all of us must come to understand and with which all of us must struggle. According to the Catechism of the Catholic Church, sin "is an offense against God as well as a fault against reason, truth and right conscience. Sin is a deliberate thought, word, deed, or omission contrary to the eternal law of God" (1849, 1853). In other words, sin is willfully rejecting good and choosing evil. In judging the degree of sin, it is customary to distinguish between mortal and venial sins. "Mortal sin," the Catechism teaches, "destroys charity in the heart of man by a grave violation of God's law . . . Venial sin allows charity to subsist, even though it offends and wounds it" (1855). (Refer to the Glossary on Mortal and Venial Sin at the end of the booklet.)3. Why is Confession necessary?

We need the sacrament of Penance because each of us, from time to time, sins. When we recognize that we have offended God who is all deserving of our love, we sense the need to make things right. Like the prodigal son in the Gospel, we long to know again the loving embrace of a forgiving father who patiently waits for each of us. Jesus himself has established this sure and certain way for us to access God's mercy and to know that our sins are forgiven. By virtue of his divine authority, Jesus gives this power of absolution to the apostolic ministry. As the Catechism of the Catholic Church says, "in imparting to his apostles his own power to forgive sins the Lord also gives them the authority to reconcile sinners with the Church" (1444).

We need to know that our sins are forgiven. There is something in our human nature that calls out for the assurance that our sins are actually forgiven. Confession is the visible manifestation of God's mercy that provides us, in human terms as well, the clear awareness that God has forgiven us.

What is the Source for the Forgiveness of Sins?

Jesus invites us to reconciliation with God. It is Christ, the Good Shepherd, who offers us forgiveness and the power to turn
away from sin. Writing to the Corinthians, Saint Paul reminds us that just as sin came into the world through Adam and Eve, so too grace and new creation come to us through Jesus Christ. Just as death came through a human being, so too the resurrection of the dead came through a human being. As in Adam all people die, so in Christ all shall be brought to life - a fullness of life, a new creation already beginning in us through grace (cf. 1 Cor 15).

This is the message we proclaim when we face the mystery of sin. Just as Adam brought sin, death, disharmony, confusion, disruption and struggle into our lives, Christ, the new Adam, gives us grace, redemption, new life and salvation. (Refer to the Glossary on Original Sin at the end of the booklet). It is in Jesus Christ that we find the beginnings of the new creation. He leads us back to the Father, overcomes the tragic alienation of sin and restores harmony. Jesus gives us newness of life in grace that begins to restore our relationship with God and that will lead to full communion with God in glory. Grace is the beginning of a new creation for all of those baptized into Christ. In short, Jesus' passion and death have rescued us and given us new life.

Why do I need to go to a priest for Confession?

It is most unfortunate that many people have adopted a mindset that they do not need to go to Confession. Many say "I just tell my sins to God and he forgives me." There is on the part of such persons a failure to recognize that the sacrament of Penance is not an invention of the Church. Rather, the sacrament of Penance is Christ's gift to the Church to ensure the forgiveness he so generously extends will be made available to every member of the Church. Once again, we cite the words of our Holy Father in highlighting the connection between Christ, his Church and the sacrament of Penance:

"From the revelation of the value of this ministry and power to forgive sins, conferred by Christ on the Apostles and their successors, there developed in the church an awareness of the sign of forgiveness, conferred through the Sacrament of Penance. It is the certainty that the Lord Jesus himself instituted and entrusted to the Church - as a gift of his goodness and loving kindness to be offered to all-a special Sacrament for the forgiveness of sins committed after Baptism" (Reconciliation and Penance, 3).

What happens in Confession?

In the sacrament of Penance, the contrite sinner comes before Christ in the person of the priest who hears the sins, imposes a penance and absolves the sinner in the name and by the power of Christ.

The sinner comes before the merciful judgment of God and approaches the Lord in sorrow, admitting guilt before his representative. It is in the person of Christ that the priest hears the confession of guilt. The words spoken in Confession are guarded by the most solemn obligation of complete confidentiality. In fact, Church law prescribes a serious penalty for any confessor who directly violates the "seal of Confession."

It is in the name of Christ that the priest pronounces the Savior's mercy: "I absolve you from your sins in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit." The Catechism reminds us that "absolution takes away sin, but it does not remedy all the disorders sin has caused" (1459). Thus, the priest imposes a penance on the penitent, which can take the form of "prayer, an offering, works of mercy, service of neighbor, voluntary self-denial, sacrifices, and above all the patient acceptance of the cross we must bear".

How do I prepare for Confession?

Confession is not difficult, but it does require preparation. We should begin with prayer, placing ourselves in the presence of God, our loving Father. We should harbor in our hearts a sense of sorrow for all we have done. The motivation for our sorrow may be out of love of God or even fear of the consequences of having offended God. Whatever the motive, contrition is the beginning of forgiveness of sin. We need to have sorrow at least to the extent that we regret it, resolve not to repeat it
and intend to turn back to God.

With this disposition of heart, we should review our lives since our last confession, searching our thoughts, words and actions to discover those that did not conform to God's love, to his law or to the laws of the Church. This is what is known as an "Examination of Conscience." (Refer to Appendix at the end of the booklet.)

Examination of Conscience on the Ten Commandments

By Father John Trigilio

In the Sacrament of Penance the Faithful who confess their sins to a Priest, are sorry for those sins and have a purpose of amendment, receive from God, through the absolution given by that Priest, forgiveness of sins they have committed after Baptism, and at the same time they are reconciled with the Church, which by sinning they wounded. (Canon 959)

Act of Contrition: O my God, I am heartily sorry for having offended Thee, and I detest all my sins because I dread the loss of Heaven and fear the pains of hell, but most of all, because they offend Thee, my God, who art all good and worthy of all my love. I firmly intend with the help of Thy grace to confess my sins, to do penance and to amend my life. AMEN

Examination of Conscience

I. “I am the Lord, thy God, thou shalt not have strange gods before Me.”

Have I sinned against Religion by seriously believing in New Age, Scientology, Astrology, Horoscopes, Fortune-telling, Superstition or engaging in the Occult? Did I endanger my Catholic Faith or cause scandal by associating with anti-Catholic groups & associations (e.g., the Freemasons)? Have fame, fortune, money, career, pleasure, etc. replaced God as my highest priority? Have I neglected my daily prayers?

II. “Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain.”

Have I committed blasphemy by using the name of God and Jesus Christ to swear rather than to praise? Have I committed sacrilege by showing disrespect to holy objects (crucifix, rosary) or contempt for religious persons (bishop, priests, deacons, women religious) or for sacred places (in Church). Have I committed sacrilege by going to Holy Communion in the state of mortal sin without first going to confession e.g., after missing Mass on Sunday or a Holyday? Did I violate the one-hour fast before Communion? Did I break the laws of fast and abstinence during Lent? Did I neglect my Easter duty to receive Holy Communion at least once? Have I neglected to support the Church and the poor by sharing my time, talent and treasure?

III. Remember to keep holy the Sabbath day

Did I miss Mass on any Sunday or Holyday of Obligation? (Bad weather and being sick do not count) Have I shown disrespect by leaving Mass early, not paying attention or not joining in the prayers? Did I do unnecessary work on Sunday which could have been done the day before? Have I been stingy in my support for the Church? Do I give of my time & talent?

IV. Honor thy Father and Mother

Parents: Have I set a bad example for my children by casually missing Mass, neglecting prayer, or ignore my responsibility to provide a Catholic education by either sending my children to parochial school or to C.C.D. (Religious Education Program)? Do I show little or no interest in my children’s faith and practice of it? Have I showed disrespect for those in authority, government or church? Have I not expressed my moral values to them?

Children: Have I been disobedient and/or disrespectful to my parents or guardians? Did I neglect to help them with household chores? Have I caused them unnecessary worry and anxiety by my attitude, behavior, moods, etc.?

V. Thou shalt not kill

Did I consent, recommend, advise, approve, support or have an abortion? Did I realize that there is an excommunication for anyone who procures an abortion? Did I actively or passively cooperate with an act of euthanasia whereby ordinary means were stopped or means taken to directly end the life of an elderly or sick person? Have I committed an act of violence or abuse (physical, sexual, emotional or verbal)? Have I endangered the lives of others by reckless driving or by driving under the influence of drugs or alcohol? Do I show contempt for my body by neglecting to take care of my own health? Have I been mean or unjust to anyone? Have I held a grudge or sought revenge against someone who wronged me? Do I point out others’ faults and mistakes while ignoring my own? Do I complain more than I compliment? Am I ungrateful for what other people do for me? Do I tear people down rather than encourage them? Am I prejudiced against people because of their color, language or ethnic-religious background?

VI. Thou shalt not commit adultery

IX. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s wife

Did I have any sex before or outside of marriage? Do I view pornographic material (magazines, videos, internet, hot-lines)? Have I gone to massage parlors or adult book stores? Did I commit the sins of masturbation and/or artificial contraception? Have I not avoided the occasions of sin (persons or places) which would tempt me to be unfaithful to my spouse or to my own chastity? Do I encourage and entertain impure thoughts and desires? Do I tell or listen to dirty jokes? Have I committed fornication or adultery?

VII. Thou shalt not steal

X. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s goods

Have I stolen any object, committed any shoplifting or cheated anyone of their money? Did I knowingly deceive someone in business or commit fraud? Have I shown disrespect or even contempt for other people’s property? Have I done any acts of vandalism? Am I greedy or envious of another’s goods? Do I let financial and material concerns or the desire for comfort override my duty to God, to Church, to my family or my own spiritual well-being?

VIII. Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor

Have I told a lie in order to deceive someone? Have I told the truth with the purpose and intention of ruining someone’s reputation (sin of detraction)? Have I told a lie or spread rumors which may ruin someone’s reputation (sin of calumny or slander)? Did I commit perjury by false swearing an oath on the Bible? Am I a busybody or do I love to spread gossip and secrets about others? Do I love to hear bad news about my enemies?

Examination of Conscience with the Theological Virtues

by Fr. John Hardon, S.J.

If there is one part of the spiritual life that St. Ignatius stressed, it was the daily--and even twice daily--examination of conscience.

As we read the , we may be overwhelmed by the minute detail of St. Ignatius' treatment of what he calls the particular examination of conscience. At the same time, he is careful to provide, "Some Notes on Scruples."

It is very important, therefore, that we form a clear and correct conscience. This means that we cultivate a sensitive judgment which is alert to the least offense against the Divine will and, at the same time, protect ourselves against the wiles of the evil spirit. "The enemy," says St. Ignatius, "considers carefully whether one has a lax or a delicate conscience. If one has a delicate conscience, the evil one seeks to make it excessively sensitive in order to disturb and upset it more easily. Thus, if he sees that one will not consent to mortal sin or venial sin, or even to the appearance of deliberate sin, since he cannot cause him to fall in a matter that appears sinful, he strives to make the soul judge that there is a sin, for example in a word or passing thought, where there is no sin" (, 349).

It is valuable to reflect on this tactic of the evil spirit before we offer some practical norms for making our daily examination of conscience. Why? Because otherwise, we are liable to overlook the importance of a daily inventory of our moral conduct for fear of becoming scrupulous.

There is such a thing as growing in prudent sensitivity of conscience, without becoming a victim of the "enemy" as St. Ignatius calls him.

We may set this down as a general principle, for those who are sincerely striving to do the will of God:

It is characteristic of God and His angels, when they act upon the soul, to give true happiness and spiritual joy and to banish all the sadness and disturbances which are caused by the enemy.

It is characteristic of the evil one to fight against such happiness and consolation by proposing fallacious reasonings, subtleties, and continual deceptions (Rules for Discernment of Spirits, II, 1).

What are we to conclude from this? That the more zealous we are in trying to please God, the more He will give us a deep interior peace of soul. We should suspect as a temptation from the evil one, when we find ourselves worried or anxious or disturbed, no matter how pious the source of the worry or anxiety may be.

The key to applying this principle is that, before God, I honestly want to do His will even though through weakness, I may fail to live up to my resolutions.

One basic virtue on which we should daily examine ourselves is peace of soul. We should ask ourselves, "Have I given in to worry or anxiety?" "Have I allowed myself to get discouraged?" A good practice is to pronounce the name, "Jesus," when we find ourselves getting despondent, or say some short aspiration like, "My Jesus, I trust in you," whenever we become dejected over something.

Particular Examen on the Theological Virtues

Before applying the particular examen to my own spiritual life, it is well to first ask myself, "What are the virtues that I know from experience I most need to develop?"

The reason why this question should first be answered is that no two of us are equally prone to commit the same kind of sins. Nor are we personally always tempted in the same direction. There is wisdom in first knowing enough about myself, to be able to get to the root of my own moral weakness. Otherwise, I may be ignoring what really needs attention in my spiritual life and concentrating on what is not so necessary for me at this time in my service of God.

Moreover, it would be a mistake to suppose that by attending to my moral failings, I am being "negative" in my pursuit of holiness.

On the contrary. In God's providence, He allows us to fail in those areas in which He especially wants us to grow in virtue.

We can fail in the practice of these virtues either by commission, omission, or by tepidity, in not acting as generously as we might in responding to the grace we have received from God.

FAITH

Do I make an honest effort to grow in the virtue of faith by daily mental prayer on the mysteries of the faith as revealed in the life of Jesus Christ?
Do I make at least a short act of faith every day?
Do I pray daily for an increase of faith?
Do I ever tempt God by relying on my own strength to cope with the trials in my life?
Do I unnecessarily read or listen to those who oppose or belittle what I know are truths of my Catholic faith?
What have I done today to externally profess my faith?
Have I allowed human respect to keep me from giving expression to my faith?
Do I make a serious effort to resolve difficulties that may arise about my faith?
Do I ever defend my faith, prudently and charitably, when someone says something contrary to what I know is to be believed?
Have I helped someone overcome a difficulty against the faith?

HOPE

Do I immediately say a short prayer when I find myself getting discouraged?
Do I daily say a short act of hope?
Do I dwell on my worries instead of dismissing them from my mind?
Do I fail in the virtue of hope by my attachment to the things of this world?
Do I try to see God's providence in everything that "happens" in my life?
Do I try to see everything from the viewpoint of eternity?
Am I confident that, with God's grace, I will be saved?
Do I allow myself to worry about my past life and thus weaken my hope in God's mercy?
Do I try to combine every fully deliberate action with at least a momentary prayer for divine help?
How often today have I complained, even internally?

CHARITY

Have I told God today that I love Him?
Do I tell Jesus that I love Him with my whole heart?
Do I take the occasion to tell God that I love Him whenever I experience something I naturally dislike?
Have I capitalized on the difficulties today to tell God that I love Him just because He sent me the trial or misunderstanding?
Do I see God's love for me in allowing me to prove my love for Him in the crosses He sent me today?
Have I seen God's grace to prove my love for Him in every person whom I met today?
Have I failed in charity by speaking unkindly about others?
Have I dwelt on what I considered someone's unkindness toward me today?
Is there someone that I consciously avoid because I dislike the person?
Did I try to carry on a conversation today with someone who is difficult to talk to?
Have I been stubborn in asserting my own will?
How thoughtful have I been today in doing some small favor for someone?
Have I allowed my mood to prevent me from being thoughtful of others today?
Am I given to dwelling on other people's weaknesses or faults?
Have I been cheerful today in my dealings with others?
Do I control my uncharitable thoughts as soon as they arise in my mind?
Did I pray for others today?
Have I written any letters today?
Have I controlled my emotions when someone irritated me?
Have I performed any sacrifice today for someone?

How do I go to Confession?

The following may be helpful in preparing for confession. Above all, do not be afraid. If you are hesitant about what to do, ask the priest for help:Greeting:
The priest welcomes the penitent warmly and greets him or her with kindness. Sign of the Cross:
Then the penitent makes the Sign of the Cross, which the priest may also make. Invitation to Trust in God:
The priest invites the penitent to have trust in God using one of the formulas in the ritual or similar words. If the penitent is unknown to the priest, it is proper for the penitent to indicate his or her state in life (married, single, or clergy), the time of his or her last confession and anything else that may help the confessor in exercising his ministry. Reading of the Word of God:Confession of Sins and Acceptance of Satisfaction:
The penitent confesses his or her sins and accepts the prayers or deeds that the priest proposes as a penance. Prayer of the Penitent and Absolution:
The priest asks the penitent to express sorrow by praying one of the prayers found in the ritual or in his or her own words. The priest then prays the Prayer of Absolution, to which the penitent responds: "Amen." Proclamation of Praise and Dismissal:
The priest continues: "Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good." The penitent responds: "His mercy endures for ever." The priest then dismisses the penitent, using one of the formulas found in the ritual.

Act of Contrition

O my God, I am heartily sorry for having offended you, and I detest all my sins because I dread the loss of heaven and the pains of hell; but most of all because they offend you, my God, who are all good and deserving of all my love. I firmly resolve with the help of your grace, to confess my sins, to do penance and to amend my life. Amen.